Canadian Down Under

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Shaking

Only one person would understand why I'm shaking.

Not bad - just a little all over tremor...

Not sure if it feels good - but I do know that it doesn't feel bad.


On a different (but maybe not) subject - did I mention that I had a migraine Saturday? About 5.8 on the Richter scale. Bad enough for me to actually take the serious medication. What's that got to do with anything?

Sunday I felt weird.

Monday and Tuesday I suffered from a mild dose of paranoia.

Today I have the tremors.

As of tomorrow - I'm never taking that stuff again.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!

The Eagles have released a new album!!!

This is going to be the BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!!!!!!

Monday, October 29, 2007

My Idol Addiction

I watch every show.

I re-arrange my life to watch it.

I hate Monday nights. That's when they let the early evictees from previous years perform. (A tad cynical, no?)

They just let Ricki-Lee perform.

She sucks. That's why she got booted before the top 5.

She can't sing. She can't dance and she can't dress.....

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Body Types

I was having dinner the other night with this guy and for some reason (and for the life of me, I don't know how I let this happen) conversation turned to a discussion on body types.

He described to me that there are three basice body types which are as follows:

The ECTOMORPH

Definitive "Hard Gainer"
Delicate Built Body
Flat Chest
Fragile
Lean
Lightly Muscled
Small Shouldered
Takes Longer to Gain Muscle
Thin

The extreme ectomorph physique is a fragile and delicate one. The bones are light, joints are small and muscles are slight. The limbs are relatively long in proportion and the shoulders droop. The ectomorph is a linear physique. Straight up and straight down, and may appear longer than he or she really is, due to the length of limbs coupled with lack of muscle mass developed on those limbs. The ectomorph is not naturally powerful and will have to work hard for every ounce of muscle and every bit of strength he or she can gain.

The MESOMORPH
Athletic
Hard Body
Hourglass Shaped (Female)
Rectangular Shaped (Male)
Mature Muscle Mass
Muscular Body
Excellent Posture
Gains Muscle Easily
Gains Fat More Easily Than Ectomorphs
Thick Skin

The mesomorph has well-defined muscles and large bones. The torso tapers to a relatively narrow and low waist. The bones and muscles of the head are prominent. Features of the face are clearly defined, such as cheek bones and a square, heavy jaw. The face is long and broad, and is cubicle in shape. Arms and legs are developed and even the digits of the hand are muscled.

The ENDOMORPH
Soft Body
Underdeveloped Muscles
Round Physique
Weight Loss is Difficult
Gains Muscle Easily

The body of the extreme endomorph is round and soft. The physique presents the illusion that much of the mass has been concentrated in the abdominal area. This may or may not be true. The arms and legs of the extreme endomorph are short in length and taper. This may give the appearance of stalkiness. The hands and feet of the endomorph are comparatively small, and the upper arms and thighs are often more developed than the lower parts of the arms or legs. The body has a high waist.

So after he describes all the different types to me, he looks at me and says "You're an endomorph."

Can you hear the ensuing deafening silence at that table?

Needless to say I didn't order dessert.

So tell me - basically he called me fat right?

(P.S. I've decided I'm a mesomorph. Hourglass is the only way to describe me...)

Thursday, October 25, 2007

How tired are you?

Now - not all of you know, but even if you haven't met me, I'm sure you've already gotten a sense of my lack of love for mornings.

With my new job, I've had to attend daily 8 am morning meetings for the last few weeks (I think it may have even been a month by now....) and they will continue until at least the end of November.

(It's killing me)

And its obvious. So much so that my boss won't say Good Morning until I've taken off my iPod, logged in and have spoken to at least someone (generally its me saying 'morning' to him (note - I dropped 'good'?)). And this morning, a regular commuter commented to me that I don't see to agree well with mornings...

Well today - I stopped on my way in and got my favourite cup of tea. (To put it nicely - tea for me is, at a minimum, my security blanket. In fact, when I went on one of those 'cleansing' diets - I had no problems giving up chocolate, Coca-Cola and most other forms of sweets and yummy food, but I would have considered cutting off my right arm for a cup of tea....)

Anyway, favourite cup of tea in hand, leave coat at desk, head to meeting. While in elevator (that unfortunately had two other people in it) I suddenly burst out 'SHIT'.

I thought about pressing the Emergency Stop button.

Know why?

Yup. I was so tired this morning, that despite making a special detour so I had my caffeinated security blanket with me at this horrible meeting, I was actually in route empty handed.

Dilemma: be on time but no tea? or be late with tea.

Not much of a contest. I was late...

Monday, October 22, 2007

I HATE being ignored!!

Had to get that out.

Thanks for listening...

Lala

Monday, October 15, 2007

Bathroom Etiquette & Strategies

I recounted this story to a friend today and she warned me that perhaps I should perhaps think about who I tell this to....

so of course I decided to blog about it.

Years ago, I remember receiving an email that contained a game about bathroom etiquette. It was meant for guys - but the same principle does apply to women's bathrooms as well. See, there were four urinals and you had to decide which urinal to use based on where current occupants where standing. It was dumb - but also funny because it was true in so many respects.

So today I had a slight variation on that game. I went in to the bathroom and it was empty. I went to a stall - and by accident a little toot slipped out (I am so laughing as I write this. It's embarrassing, but we've all been there.) Not usually a problem - but remember: I was at work.

Anyway, I figured I was alright because I was alone in the bathroom.

Or at least I thought I was.

Because suddenly I heard the scuffle of feet coming from a stall way down the row.

Now I was in a dilemma.

I had two options:
1. Wait the person out. (Stay in cubicle until other person leaves the bathroom so they don't know who your are)
or
2. Hurry up and leave before they leave their stall.

Now - given that they were trying to remain undiscovered - it became apparent that option 2 really was my only choice.

Not to worry - I got out before discovered, but the whole event did add an un-needed level of stress to the day...

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Spitting the Dummy

I was talking to a friend from back home the other day and in passing, used the phrase "I spit the dummy."

I think I've become slightly Australianized - because it wasn't until my friend interrupted me and asked "what does that mean", that I realised I've adopted a new phrase over and above the "no worries" that I've been using for the last few years.

So I explained: "its like when a baby spits the dummy" and then continued on as though that was all settled.

Until today.

Today I realised that my explanation probably still didn't help clear it up. "spit the dummy" is something a baby does - but the key that's missing to decipher that is that a 'dummy' is a pacifier. So 'spitting the dummy' is when a baby spits out the pacifier and has a full cry/whine/grumble.

So 'spitting the dummy' is like having a mini tanty.

Ughh - still way too Australianized!!! 'Tanty' means tantrum.....

All clear??

Friday, October 05, 2007

I think Australia is rubbing off on me...

I went to a Canada party tonight.

There was a huge Canada flag on the wall at the bar.

I wanted it.

I took it.

How very un-Canadian of me.

See what happens when you live in a land founded by convicts???

Thursday, October 04, 2007

I couldn't do it again if I tried....

Last night I was making myself some pasta for dinner. I thought the pasta was cooked, but I wasn't sure, so I pulled one piece of penne pasta out and tested it. The thing is - I only put it half way in my mouth - and in doing so, unknowingly let the boiling hot water that was still IN the noodle (yes, I should have made sure I had drained it....) drip down my bottom lip.

IMMEDIATELY my lip blistered.

Seriously.

Now I have lost most of the skin on my bottom lip.

It looks hideous!!!!!

Almost all bad as me sitting around with an ice pack on my face all evening.....

Makes eating a little hard.

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Tuesday, October 02, 2007

I have been replaced!!!!

A few months back I went to visit my niece in Melbourne. Apparently after I was dropped off at the airport, she cried all the way home because she missed me. (Cute huh?)

When she came to visit last weekend, I dropped her off at the airport and apparently as they were boarding the plane, she lamented how much she missed..... no not ME...but MONSTER!!!

Today I came home to find a package from my Mom. There was a cartoon strip about a cat, a newspaper article about fat cats and two toys.... neither of which was for me.

I think I've been demoted!

Monday, October 01, 2007

I have a secret

I soooooooo want to write about it - no need to write about it -but can't for fear of being found out....

Perhaps its about a boy, perhaps its not....

I said something tonight that I think may have some long term impact. Not because of the response to what I said - well, not a verbal response at any rate - but there was a muscle in the face that twitched....almost looked pained....

Time will tell.

Insomnia

has struck again.

Perhaps the 3 hour nap today wasn't such a great idea.....