Canadian Down Under

Saturday, September 26, 2009

I found it on my trip home

My mom kept telling me that I had left something behind lwhen I was home late last year. She tried to describe it for me but really, I didn't know what the hell she was talking about.

Went home about a month ago and she reminded me about it and lo and behold she was right! There it was on the front hall counter!

My sense of humour!!!!

Put it into my front pocket right smartly.
Didn't realise how much I'd missed it.....

The things you find while surfing the net....

I came across the list below. Would be great if it was about me, however I few things are a dead giveaway:
- #15?? Not a chance this is me...
- I'm hoping #18 isn't me...
- #39 - definitely not me either...

Oh - and I gotta say - initially I thought this was pretty funny, but a couple things are bugging me... 1. this guy sounds a little needy, and 2? he can't count

Sixty Reasons I Love Laura
1. Her smile
2. Her bright eyes
3. Her zest for life
4. Her playfulness
5. Her rich imagination
6. Her sense of humor
7. Her passion
8. Her creativity
9. Her sensuality
10.Her initiative
11.Her 'joie de vivre'
12.Her spontaneity
13.Her love for animals
14.Her love for children and babies
15.Her cooking
16.Her courage
17.Her cuddlyness
18.Her large gentle hands
19.Her caress
20.Her full body hugs
21.Her kiss
22.Her backrubs
23.Her love for me
24.Her ability to see deep into me
25.Her appreciation of the things I do
26.Her ability to know what to say and do when I need comforting
27.Her encouraging me to 'fight back' when I was so timid in our early days
28.Her sense of justice
29.Her ability to make me feel secure
30.Her encouragement of all my creative efforts
31.Her ability to inspire me
32.Her deep concern for everyone she loves
33.Her foresight
34.Her unique insights into problems
35.Her adventurous nature
36.Her always active mind
37.Her sentimentality
38.Her romantic nature
39.Her willingness to admit an error
40.Her outgoing nature
41.Her understanding of my passion
42.Her ability to give honest criticism when I ask
43.Her understanding when I disagree, and go ahead with my original idea
44.Her ability to compromise
45.Her willingness to try new things
46.Her ability to change her mind
47.Her sense of style
48.Her wit
49.Her love of life
50.Her love of nature
51.Her appreciation of my enthusiasm, even if she doesn't share that particular enthusiasm
52.Her joy in being loved
53.Her ability to take a stand
54.Her flexibility
55.Her ability to get over being angry
56.Her belief in herself
57.Her belief in me
58.Her energy
59.Her determination
60.Her love for her family
61.Her sense of community
62.Her sense of fair play
63.Her being fully present to the moment
64.Her generous nature
65.Her radiance that proceeds from every cell of her being

Some online shopping perhaps?

You might want to try this link:

Saturday, September 19, 2009

The golfing gorilla

So golf.
I like golf – not so much all weekend long (yes, I can hear the gasp of horror from here) but me, I’m more a sampler of things when it come to sporting activities rather than a dedicated athlete.
Armchair football.
Music. Oh wait – not a sport. Sorry, but my love of music pushes it into any and every category there is….
Back to golf.
Haven’t played since I broke my elbow. (That was so painful, it made me cry – which is why my brother knew it was broken (according to my siblings, I am a crybaby – but I never cry from physical injuries….) then I passed out.)
Managed to break it just a month after bringing my clubs over.
If nothing else – I’m all about timing…
But I used to golf with work sometimes back in Canada.
One such outing prompted my boss to tell me the story about the golfing gorilla:
So…this guy take a gorilla golfing. Sets him up on the tee, hands him a driver and lets him at it.
Gorilla swings.
Smacks the ball 400 yds.
Straight down the fairway where it rolls to a stop about a foot from the hole.
People are impressed!
There’s even some clapping…
The guy thinks this is fabulous (already planning in his head how to make money off the gorilla) and sets him up to putt – actually gives him his favourite putter….
Gorilla swings.
Smacks the ball 400 yards.

Apparently that’s also the way I play. I can hit it a ton off the tee (straight even) but yeah, no short game.
None whatsoever.
Good ol’ baseball swing…
(Truth be told, I’m not really into delicate – I prefer to smash and hit for the fences…)
Yeah. I mentally still play baseball even though I have a golf club in my hand.

Did I mention...

I'm really crap at shaving my legs.
Sounds frivolous, but this is becoming quite a serious issue as we head into summer here...
Seriously - I think I've managed to 'epilady' all those suckers out and then it only takes one moment of sunshine and I realise I have something akin to a grassy landing strip up the side of my leg...


If only I cared more - I might actually do it right.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

They do know its meant to be baseball, not boxing right?

God love 'em - Jays duking it out in the Bronx....

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Sharp tongue...Sharp fingers

Same thing really.

Seems I apparently can be quite cutting - and perhaps a little sharp.

Going to eat me some humble pie....

Lesson learnt? Ughhh - you think I would have learnt this one by now - its not like I haven't done it before - but I need to stop and think instead of simply reacting and shooting from the hip.

Really - I'm never going to learn that...

Means I'm going to have to spend the rest of my life apologising.
Well - at least I'm generally good at that.
It's not like I haven't had lots of practice.....

I can't do funerals

I'm not saying I won't do them, I'm saying I can't do them. They make me cry - like really cry. (I'm such a baby.) To be clear - when I say funerals - I do mean like real ones that you attend (more on that later) but also ones on tv.


I'm sitting here watching Anne of Green Gables (like the loser I am on a Saturday night...) and Matthew's just died. I've seen this show at least 5 times - if not more (like the good Canadian I am) and yet I still cry.

And this is only tv!!!

You should see me at a real funeral. Its unbearable. I can't control it - the tears just stream down. Its like someone turns a faucet on and it just goes. A few years back, my family attended our ministers funeral - and maybe its because he presided over my father's - but tears ran down my face from beginning to end. To the point my brother looked at me and said "really??? what's with you?" in an incredulous whisper.

It almost made me laugh - because I so agreed with him.

The good thing is that tv funerals only last a few minutes.
Matthew's is over now - so I'm good now.

I'm sure there's something wrong with me - but at least now I can return to watch the rest of the show...

Friday, September 11, 2009

"So how is it that a girl like you is still single?"

That's number one on my list of really stupid fucking questions.

How in the hell are you meant to answer that?
And the worst part is that generally when people ask, they already think they know the answer. And sometimes they can't help themselves but share it.
Apparently current reasons include:
  • I'm too picky
  • I'm a 'career' girl (whatever that means - and besides whoever said that really doesn't know me)
  • I'm too smart
  • I don't like men (not true - but that doesn't stop some of the older generation from thinking if I'm this old and single, I must be gay....)

I'm sure there have been other reasons, but damned if I know what they are.

What kills me is when some guy asks me that. Especially when they rave on about how wonderful I am and then ask. What the??? I actually think they are in a better place to comment on that than me... seeing as they're the guy who doesn't want to date me...

Not sure where this rant came from today - but I'm just here to entertain....

Thursday, September 10, 2009

One of the rules of life: #53 Be Nice

My friend gave me the book "The Rules of Life" as a belated birthday present.
Not really my thing but I read it through on the flight from Toronto to Los Angeles.
Some good ideas.
Simple rules - but some that are hard to live by.

Like rule #53: Be Nice.

I broke that one today. It doesn't matter what provoked it, I still didn't take the higher ground.

Repercussions will likely be felt tomorrow.
The worst possible outcome: there are no repercussions and I'm greeted with silence...

Part of the trials and tribulations???

I miss winter.
I miss snow.
I miss the seasons.

I miss Canada.

Don't get me wrong, I love Australia, what with the sunshine, beaches, great weather (mostly) and casualness, but its just not home.

And home is something I seem to be craving these days...

Just ask

The truth is, I'm pretty shy. (Some of you may think that's unbelievable - but really - its true)
And I'll do anything to avoid rejection.
Including being cryptic in conversations and taking the long road to get to the point.

Something that if you mix with how straight forward I am, can only spell disaster.

So recently, I wanted to know something and I decided I was just going to have to come out and ask.
But it took me a few tries to screw up the courage.

It didn't turn very well.
Now all I want to say is something along the lines of shutting the front door (see my earlier post)
But you know what?
Now I know.
And all I had to do was ask..

Sunday, September 06, 2009

He chose me

(I think this is my favourite so far...)

You know, its funny, but only a day after I chose me (see earlier post) so did someone else!

I had so much fun. He was so funny. I wouldn't call him 'sweet' but he was really good to me.

And good for me.

A gentle giant, big bear of a man. (His hands were so big that when he held mine, it disappeared. Yum!!)

It really is the little things that count.

Shut the Front Door

I told you I had a lot to write about.... It's all coming out at once!!!

This one I have to write about so I don't forget.

My best friend has three girls all around the early teen years. So, old enough to fully understand conversations and their content (no matter what the subject) but still young enough that perhaps they don't need to be exposed to all of it.

But her and I can't help but talk (okay - mostly me, but she's right in there with me as well...) so we work around the above problem by talking in a best friend short hand code which mostly works for us - except we're really bad at the swearing thing (I am by far the worst offender though...) and I usually end up stuffing up in front of the kids (bad Laura...)

But not this year. By the time I arrived she had a new code all ready for use:



It's very liberating to use as well: the right number of syllables and mostly the right consonants.

Verbal satisfaction without the corruption of minors.


Don't let the door hit you on your way out.

I choose me!

You know, being home was fabulous. I feel fully restored to my former self (well, former self with bad jet lag....)

So what happened? Well, nothing really. Nothing except a lot of time (and a lot of quality time) with people whom I love - and love me.

I've always said I have fabulou friends at home - and you know - even though I've been gone 7 years, they still come through.

How right was I?
And how fabulous are my friends?

I love the late night talks at the cottage - because that's where you get the quality chats in . The ones where you get to the heart of the matter. The ones where you laugh til you cry - without seeminf to talk about serious shit along the way - yet somehow you do.

I had one such chat one night with my best friend and somewhere in the midst of it I said "no one ever chooses me".

Now, I can't remember how we got to that point or what precipitated that comment, but I want to be clear: it was not said in a self-pitying kind of way.

Not at all.

It just kind of sums up the last few years.

So it sounds bad - but its really not. See, I got to thinking about it and I wondered why I was expecting others to choose me, when I never seem to choose myself.

A few nights later (another late night conversation at the cottage) I was rehashing with another of those fabulous life long friends I have and I told her about it and she corrected me and said that in fact, many people choose me. Her being one of them.

A slight different perspective on what I originally meant, but still, she was right.

And in the end, its not just them, its me as well.

I choose me too.

Friday, September 04, 2009

I'm back

Hi - I've been in the land up over - also known as the great white north - however there was no whiteness to be had.

Feeling good. Feeling refreshed.

Which means.....

Lots of stories. Now I know I had a set plan of writing once a day - however, I don't really seem to like rules... so I will post as the spirit hits, which might be a few times a day at the moment...

Must go get my little notebook. Hope you missed me.
I must admit - I'm not sure I'm happy to be back, but I am happy that I feel like writing again!